Because Politics Is Stupid

Out of the very few useful things that these elections taught me, my favorite one was knowing that organisms like Amit Shah actually exist. I was tired of believing that Saurabh Shukla and Satish Kaushik played only fictitious characters in bollywood.


The other good thing about the elections was that Indian-version-of-blonde of a human being known as Rahul Gandhi. After that epic interview with Arnab Goswami, which left the audience in splits and Sonia Gandhi with a facepalm, I realised how easy it is to create a fool out of oneself on TV. A stay at Bigg Boss house or being Ekta Kapoor is no more necessary for that.

The unending and sometimes annoying coverage of elections on TV, newspaper and even facebook really increased my general knowledge. For example, now I know that Snoop-gate wasn’t related to voyeurism or pornography, and I was trying to search about it on the wrong website. Also, now I know what a ‘Third Front’ is. As per my understanding, these are regional parties which, if get more than 20 seats, become important. Or as Manmohan Singh calls them, pain-in-the-ass.

Then there was the Modi-wave. The man is believed to have been born in Kryptonmati Ashram, and has led his state to milestones in development which, if you ask me, can be summed up as Lol-dry-state-whats-the-use.

I voted for Modi, and then committed hara-kiri by telling that to people on facebook. I was called anti-national, communal, April’s fool and was angry enough to find myself following Giriraj Singh’s Twitter account. You can follow him too at @IRCTC_DelhitoLahoreTrainservice.

There was also a minor Aam Aadmi Party current prevailing, at least in Delhi. As a 23-year old unemployed couch-potato, I would prefer that they take care of the corruption in IPL first. I’m sure Shazia Ilmi would bring more glamour quotient. And Dilli-wallas would be happy to see a team perform worse than Delhi Daredevils. Win-win! Since the elections are over, I can be honest. I didn’t vote for them because I am scared of Amit Shah, the man solely responsible for increased cases of nocturnal enuresis(bed wetting) in UP.

Now that the BJP government has been elected with a majority, I wish them best of luck. May Rajnath Singh (Yes, that Raza Murad’s voice-double guy) be better than that pseudo-Susheel guy and hopefully Arun Jaitley will not find his name being urinated upon on Railway station walls.

Also, I am worried about the fact that Falguni Pathak may be named the National Singer of India. About that, please Mr. Modi, let’s not make any rash decisions here.



About Ankit Sharma

Doctor and Drummer in making... Movie-buff since birth.
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